Promise Me
by Elenhin
Summary: Another one shot, Alec admits another fear of his, and asks James to promise him one thing. Deep friendship, but no slash.


Author's note: This is a one-shot I wrote to explore the relationship between Alec and James. I am intending to post a longer story featuring the two of them later, and this is partly to explore their different backgrounds first.

There are many similarities in Alec's and James' childhoods, but also many differences, and I wanted to explore what they would come to mean in their relation ship.

Very big thank you to Forever Faramir who once more have turned my spelling errors into correct words.

Disclaimer: I do not own James Bond, Alec Travelyan or any other James Bond related item or person. I have only borrowed the characters and will return them. Not even making any serious attempt at kidnapping Alec, and as I have gotten some special glue form Q, he shall appear utterly unharmed.

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_**Promise Me**_

It is said that there are times when you feel your own mortality much more than you normally do. It was true James decided. There were times when you felt death breathing down your neck. Like when you were hanging from a rope about a hundred and forty stories up. It was hard not to picture what would happen if the rope suddenly snapped. Beside him Alec was hanging from his own rope and working his way into the building.

They were entering by the means of getting a window open. It was a risky position for them to be hanging on the wall of the building, not only because it was a long way down, but also because they could be spotted any second.

The two of them would not really stand a chance if the whole building security was set on them.

Finally, Alec had made enough of a hole that the two of them could slip inside. Unhooking the rope from the harnesses they were wearing.

The two men knew their part of the job, and did not need to confirm it with each other. Alec headed one way, and James headed the other. James' job was to pull some information from a computer in the building.

Alec's job was to make sure that no one interrupted him, and that it took some time for the owners of the office to find out just what James had been doing. Hopefully they would not find out about it at all, if Alec did a good enough job of covering up their tracks.

Just a few minutes later they met up with each other again, heading towards the roof without a word. They wanted down, fast. The fastest way was jumping off the roof. Unfortunately, it also tended to be slightly lethal if you just jumped. Since neither of them cared much about the lethal part they had made sure to take precautions, this time in the form of specially made parachutes.

A standard parachute would make to little difference; they were not high enough up in the air for it to actually work as it was supposed to. These ones were made for the lesser height of the building. It would be a hard landing, but it shouldn't be too bad.

A quick check to make sure that everything was as it should with the harness, and then the two of them ran to the roof edge, leaping straight off.

The fall was no long enough for them to note anything about the decent. There was the hard jerk as the parachute unfolded, and a mere few seconds later they landed on the pavement, grunting as they bent knees and rolled to absorb the shock of landing.

"You okay, Double-ooh-six?" James asked as he climbed back to is feet.

"Yeah, let's get out of here." Alec grinned as he to stood, quickly bunching up the material that was spread around him.

"Come on then." James had done the same, and now they sprinted to where they had left the car. Alec tucked the two bundles of light material in the trunk while James jumped into the driver's seat. Alec got in on the other side, grinning. It was typical of James and his ego to want to be the one driving.

Well, he could have his fun at the moment; Alec would demand his turn later. The rumors at the base had it that there was no other driver there as reckless as the famous James Bond.

Well, Alec could give him a run for his money any day. It was a thrill for both of them to see how hard they could push the engine, to see how long you could balance all that power on the edge.

James had the reputation of being more reckless since he had crashed more cars than Alec. They usually became burning wrecks after James had played with them for some time. Alec had crashed his fair share as well. There were times when it just could not be avoided.

Such as when someone was shooting at you.

James was still well in the lead thought, and as a result, most everyone thought that he was the more reckless driver. It all added up and made people say that Double-ooh-seven was the best agent. There was not really any room for Double-ooh-six in those rumors; no one needed six when seven was around. No one wanted Alec if they could have James.

What they would never understand was that seven was nothing without six. Seven needed six, just as six needed seven. They were as good as they were because they were together.

"Almost too easy." James grinned as he shifted gear.

Alec listened to the sound of the engine, James was pressing it hard, but it still fired off each cylinder as smoothly as ever.

"I like easy jobs." Alec noted as he leaned back in his seat. "Makes me feel I've earned my pay."

James snorted. "It's the hard jobs that are supposed to make you feel that way Alec."

Alec shook his head. "No, the hard ones are the ones when I think I'm not getting paid enough." He grinned. "Tortured by insane maniacs with delusions of grandeur who's trying to take over the world was never in the job description James. And I want overtime pay when dealing with them."

James burst out laughing. Alec made it sound about as inconvenient as a late night at the office. It was what he did best; play down some of the things they had been forced to deal with.

"Tell you what Alec; next time you have to deal with that, and don't get overtime for it, I'll buy you a pint."

"I can settle for that." Alec grinned as he looked out the window. "You know James." He then began thoughtfully. "I'm not even sure about what was in the job description."

"That's typical of you not to read it." James laughed as he took a fast turn. "Didn't you think of reading the fine print?"

"I'm not sure if there was any fine print at all." Alec snorted. "I just got asked if I would care to work for the government and the Queen. I asked what I would be doing, and they said they could guarantee it wouldn't be boring. Of course I signed on."

"Most people would have asked more before agreeing." James chided him.

"Most people did not transfer from the military." Alec shot back. "I did not even know England had people like us."

"And you are sure we do now?" James teased.

"Pretty sure, no one else would be stupid enough to go this fast at this time of night." Alec shrugged. "And I must admit that they did not lie, it hasn't been boring this far."

"More interesting than the average desk job." James agreed.

"So I won't complain about it." Alec went on. "This is certainly much preferable than doing nothing but sit at a bloody desk and stare at papers from nine to five."

"Which reminds me, soon as we get back we'll have to sit at our desk and stare at papers." James grinned. "Moneypenny wants the report in the morning Alec; we had best have it for her by then."

"Moneypenny needs to understand that she can't always have what she wants," Alec groaned. Personally he wanted to sleep after several nights when he had been working more than sleeping.

"M wants it as well." James grinned. "You're out numbered Alec."

"Yeah, seems like it." Alec noted the speed they were traveling at. "So would you please stop dawdling so that we can get back and get started? The sooner we can get going about it the sooner we can finish it."

James laughed, he was already going at a speed most people considered worse than reckless, and Alec wanted him to go faster. It was back to the old game they played when one would see if he could make the other sweat in the passenger seat, pulling turns that would have a race car driver nervous, and see if he could make Alec become unsettled. No luck so far though. Alec knew him too well, knew how to tell if he was in control over the car or not. He did not get nervous easily.

It would take some serious driving if he was to get Alec nervous about it, and the engine in this car couldn't be made to give that much.

What had Alec sweating and fidgeting was being stuck behind the desk. Shuffling papers around and trying to sort it out enough that they could hand it over to Moneypenny in the morning. James was ready to agree with Alec: it was a little to much to ask of them, but Moneypenny wouldn't see it that way. She would be quite unhappy with the two of them if they failed.

She was one of the few women who had ever failed to respond to James' charm. She was always just as cold to him, and there was nothing he could say to her to make her thaw. Alec hadn't even tried. She was James' conquest to make.

At least that was how James saw it and Alec wasn't about to intrude there. Besides, it was very amusing to watch her turn him down time after time and then a few times more. No matter what James tried, Moneypenny never allowed him to win the round. It was one of the things Alec admired about her: she could stand her ground even against James, and she was quite a nice person to talk with. He enjoyed the few minutes he would spend leaning against her desk occasionally.

"Alec, snap out of it," James grinned as he tapped his shoulder. He had pulled up into the underground garage below the base.

Alec grinned; it had not taken them long, not after he made James hurry up a slight bit.

If he was lucky they would finish in time so he would be able to sleep for at least one or two hours tonight. In this line of work you had to be optimistic.

It was the part of their job that reminded of normal work: the office work most men occupied themselves with. No immediate danger there, except for paper cuts. It was the closest either of them would ever come to a normal job. Yet all the nights with not enough sleep was catching up on Alec, and made it hard for him to drop his earlier thoughts.

He didn't fear losing his life in the line of duty as he feared losing James. Because they were the team that worked the best together. The darlings of M-I6, the playboy team as they were also called. The playboy twins occasionally, because when they both had dressed up in dinner jackets, there really wasn't very much difference between them. Eye and hair colour mostly, a few slight differences in their physical appearance, but they acted a lot like each other. They carried themselves much the same way.

Oh, yes, they were referred to as playboys, the ones who would never spend more of their lives with one woman than one night. The thing was, could you really commit yourself with a clean conscious, knowing you might get shot the very next week. Wouldn't that be more cold hearted?

Alec could never stand the thought of commitment knowing he mightn't be able to keep that promise. If not so by his choice, then by someone else's gun.

Was it not fairer then to let them know from the start that there would never be more than one night, one brief moment? Was it not more considerate for them not to get their hopes up about a life together? For how could be promise them that, doing what he did?

Growing up in an orphanage had meant two things to Alec; he never wanted to be the reason another child ha to do the same thing. Orphanages weren't so bad, and the one Alec had grown up in had been better than some, but it was a lonely way for a child to grow up.

That was the second thing; Alec had no understanding of what a family meant. He had no comprehension of the love in a family. James talked about it, and it was fascinating to him. Yet being loved by adults was a foreign concept to the child who had never felt loved by any adults.

It was a paid job for them, taking care of the children. The staff was there the whole time, but they worked shifts, there were never the same ones there two nights in a row. They changed during the day.

They took care of the children, they soothed hurt and washed scraped knees, but they did not love the children, it was not their job. The children were there until they could be adopted into real families, by parents that would love them.

It was only Alec who would never be adopted, he had known that. When he had been there for five years, and seen all the other children be adopted, one by one. Had seen new children come and then leave again, Then he knew that he would never walk out of there holding onto someone's hand. He had though that there was something wrong with him, because no one wanted him. That he had done something wrong, and was being punished for it. He had helped take care of the younger children, because they turned to him. They turned to him because he was the one who would always be there.

It had been years before they had told him that it was not his fault he had not been adopted. Many more years before he understood that something else was going on, that there was a reason for it. Then he was offered a chance to g to the boarding school, and Alec hadn't missed a beat in deciding to go there.

It wasn't a horrible childhood, but it had been utterly deprived of love.

The brotherly love between him and James was the first contact the youth had ever had with love, and it had taken him by surprise when he realized it. There was a mutual brotherly love between them, they were each others family, but James had known real family love before and so had an edge over Alec.

Alec, for his part had come to count on it, treasure it and cling to it for his life. If he didn't have that, didn't have James, then he would be adrift again as he had been before. Alec could not stand to think about what he would be without James. He could go on a mission alone if he had to, but he could not stand to think about being alone forever.

It was the one thing that he knew would destroy him.

"Alec?" James voice cut into his thoughts. "What's the matter with you today?"

"Nothing James, was just thinking." Alec shrugged.

James leveled him with a look. "About what? You were miles away."

Alec drew in a deep breath and tried to bring order to his thoughts. "James, don't laugh at me, okay. But I was thinking about how easily things can go wrong. I don't think I could ever go on without you."

"I would never laugh at you for that," Jams said softly. It was a fear they all shared after all. "But it's not a good thing to think about, it'll eat away at you Alec."

"I know," Alec sighed. "But you know I never had any family James.You're the only one I know really cares about me, its hard to never think about that." He looked up at James, just this once he would express this in words. If he didn't then someday he would wish he had.

"look James, promise me one thing, please. I know you don't want to think about this, and neither do I really. But just this once, please promise me."

"What?" James didn't want to think about losing Alec. He wasn't sure if he would really handle it so much better than Alec, but he loved Alec too much not to want to ease his fears if he could.

"Promise me that if I ever go missing on a mission, that you will try and find out what happened to me." Alec said quietly. He knew that he would never be able to rest before he had found out about James if it should be him that went missing. Yet Alec who had never heard the words 'I love you' spoken by anyone feared to be forgotten. He feared that he would never have mattered so much to anyone that they would remember him. He feared to know that no one truly cared that he was no longer there.

"I don't want to be just another anonymous star on the memory wall, James. The one no one knows whom it's there for, and no one cares. I want to know that I mattered enough to at least one person, to find out what happened to me. Promise me James, that I do matter enough to you that you will try and find that out, that there will be someone who cares enough to know the name of the star."

Alec always tried not to let his fears get the better of him, but there was times when it was hard. Now James had gotten up from his seat and come across to stand behind Alec, one hand on his shoulder.

James, the one who always claimed that agents had to be strong enough not to be bothered by such things still understood Alec. He knew why the younger man feared it, because he knew he was the only one that Alec felt loved him.

Losing that was more terrifying to Alec than losing his life. Now he looked at the one who was as close to him as any brother could. They had shared love, joy, and hardship. Pain and the thrill of danger. Alec was what made him complete, but he himself didn't have that insecurity, he had been lucky in that regard, and he wanted to take that fear away from his friend.

Alec mattered more to him than anyone else ever would, and he wanted him to know it.

"I promise."

The End.

This was the fifth one shot. I hope you all enjoyed it, here is also review response for the fourth one. I want to thank everyone who have read those stories.

/Elenhin

Silveni: I like your reviews, very much, its so very nice to read them, and they make my week. I think that I would be more scared if someone in their profession never had any nightmares about it, but I still feel sorry for it. I also want to thank you for your vote, it is a strange thing to vote for, but I would rather give my vote for the two of them to be brothers, then for some politicians to be allowed to do what they are doing, so thank you.

Earendil Eldar: I have nightmares that are real enough at times, I've also been known to sleep walk a few times, so I am never quite sure what I do when I sleep. You know, I am running out of way to express how much those kind words you always seem to have for me, really means to me. I am not used to people being kind to me, or saying kind things, but I really like it, thank you.

Iolana Khenemet: Ah, yes, hearing Alec talk about the monster land should have James confused. I guess we shall see just what it does soon, it is written, and will be posted once it is also corrected. This one is also about Alec's fear, to never have meant anything to anyone, and I know how that feels when you doubt that. I think that knowing Alec's fears, might shine a different light at what happened in the movie. I hope you enjoy this now.

JJJJJJJJBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOONND: This is not slash, I do not write slash, thought I might write very deep friendship. I do however hope that you read this.


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